Sorta kinda a little regret

Something you regret not having done last year.

Ha ha ha the post a day – missed yesterday. The above line is all I wrote.  No wait. I cut and pasted that line from the 30 day blogging challenge. Admittedly I sat down thinking about the last year and none of my “regrets’ seemed  so regrettable. That is perhaps a good thing. There are several little things I did which I thought I should not have done. like I wish I had confronted head on, a girl that I had to work with on a project, about her frustrating and somewhat cold attitude towards me. She is very young and I guess I tried to be too understanding and give her space to do her part . I tried to communicate with her but she just seemed to have judged me from day one. She is a Christian (no problem) but I think makes her feel like she must deal with non-church going Christians and others as if they were a person covered in contagious sores. Most times when I spoke to her or asked her questions she would just blankly stare back at me or she would make some weird ‘effed’ up statement that was weirdly blanketed in polite responses. On a few rare occasions she would relax and a really nice person would emerge (That happened only 1 out of 10 times we would have to meet) then the next day it was like she would remember that she wasn’t supposed to like me and she would pull back into this other person who would barely respond.  I guess I was to ‘secular’ for her. She was cool with everyone else on the team. Up to now, I still don’t know what I did to that girl. Other people in class said they experienced it too but as we had to work together I guess I had to deal with it more. Anyway that was one thing.

I also sorta kinda a little regret (not that much:)) not working on a film with a young director. The script was not bad and I would not have minded being busy and doing something but I never met the man and he wanted me to confirm working with him without meeting him or even setting up a meeting. Also he wanted me to work for free with idea of getting something later on. I had no idea of his shooting schedule either. My regret here really is being able to work on a film and keep learning and also to look at how someone else from my country does their film. We don’t have a large film industry here and it is a area that is now opening it’s eyes. Trinidad has a fairly long way to go still in the last 50 years I cant count on my two hands the amount of feature length films done here by locals. Documentaries we can do but narrative……as we say in Trinidad ‘we comin’ to come’ still.

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